Faint Smile

I still have that faint smile when I reminisce our days
It is like a dream, it happened so fast and did not last
Look straight into my eyes, you’ll see my blazing love
Listen to my loud heartbeat as it cries over you
I want you back here in my arms, I’m longing for you
Oh Baby why leave me into such misery
Despite all the pain, my love for you stays the same

21 Years of Age

It is a fast-paced life, things are happening so fast. The truth is this is not how I anticipated my life and to be honest enough, my life now is more than I imagined. Thank God, my mom, and my friends for bringing out the best in me. I mean it. I never imagined my life to be this good. My mom always said that I’m a lucky person, and I’m lucky indeed. Opportunity knocks on my door every time that I lost my way. Funny enough I’m scared, thinking I’m living my life too easy, too easy to be branded unfair, and I’m afraid I might lose everything if I mess up. Its 50% luck, another 50% for will and skill. Life gave me simple opportunities to see the true value of life and I’m happy to say that I don’t regret anything. I’m ready for any challenge life has to offer.

I can’t think of anything different from my youth up to this time. My passions now are still the same passions I had when I was a child. I’m now 21 years of age. Nothing’s different except that I’m more proud. I love my life. I love how I lived my life and I will continue to live my life this way.

Come back

I am too weak to resist, too hurt to speak
You brought me down to my knees
Now this is a crazily twisted fate
Someone swept your heart away
Or you just did fell out of love
For that, I’m now falling apart
She turned around and walked away
With a devil smile on her face mocking me
I can’t feel anything
Not hatred, not love, I am numb
I’m refusing, denying reality
Pleading for God’s help to change your mind
Accepting this will be death itself
Can you stay here for a little while?
You left me without tears, and now, I’m full of it
I just hope that you’re happy after what you did
And if ever you change your mind
You’re welcome to come back

Separate ways

It’s a long night, rain pouring outside
Lights are off, it’s dark cold
I lie here half awake, thinking of you
I gave up everything and gained nothing
Maybe I’m trying so hard for something I cannot have
Or maybe I’m trying so hard to save what we have
Here I am, can’t move, can’t talk, can’t scream
Can I Just give up, since it hurts so bad?
I’m not that strong you know that you know everything
I have short temper, I am impulsive, and I am stupid
I am weak, barely standing in my feet
I don’t know what to do anymore
And it feels so wrong trying to hold on
Let’s just walk away, and see life in different separate ways

Separate ways

You introduced me to paradise
Then I made you my happiness, my princess
You removed all the fears and insecurities
Those smiles and laughs are the best
We made a short simple journey
Created our own history with our own smiles
We loved each other, trust one another
We are buddies, brothers, lovers
But in the end, issues arise, a taste of differences
Independent, dependent, black and white, green and red
The old days are gone, we both made our mistakes
It seems like we argue every day, we are almost strangers again
This is the toughest decision I made, you made me no choice
I’m sorry but this is not working, I can’t stay anymore
It’s not your fault, there is no one to blame
I never imagined this time will come
The time of tears and regrets
As we go our separate ways

Problems

I tend to overthink. I always try to analyze each possible consequence in every decision that I’ll make. It’s like turning every decision in a “what if” statement and seeing each result of every step. I’m not a risk taker, I don’t take chances, and I want a smooth way to solve anything. I know that every decision has its own consequence, but if you know what will you’re going to face then you can brace for impact. Most of the time, my probability works making next steps easier to calculate, experience helps every now and then, building my confidence throughout the process.

However, sometimes there is an unknown variable that will suddenly appear out of nowhere. Fate plays, my probability sucks, and everything will fall apart. That will be a hard-earned lesson as they say. Confidence will decline, but instead of blaming my decision or looking for someone to blame, I can, I must turn that situation in a positive form, like a challenge thus turning it into an encouragement. That will be an ideal goal, it’s hard to do, but that’s the way it is. With that unforeseen situation, I’ll lose trust in my analytical problem-solving skills, but it will add to my bravery to overcome such unforeseen problems in the future.

I never knew

I’m speechless, flabbergasted, stunned and surprised.
I don’t know what to act, to react, and to respond.
I’m in denial, then rejection, then depression phase.
I’m angry and furious, hurting and down.
I’m in awe. I’m feeling sad, worthless, and foolish.
I looked pathetic, helpless and pitiful.
I never knew love would turn out this way.
I never knew that love hurt this much.

My princess

You’re my princess in every single fairy-tale
Dreaming all of them will come true
Hard to find someone like you
That smile, that eyes, that body I can’t resist
I’m mesmerized, you should let me love you
Enticed, you heard the beat of my heart
Close your eyes, let me come closer
Hold my hand, let’s fly together
Girl, you got everything I like, attitude
Been through this and that, you’re the boss
Calling “oh my”, she had no fear
I’ll teach you how to love, open your heart
Hug me tight, I might lose control
Don’t hide, you’re always on my mind
I’m your number one fan, let me hold your hand
Dance or sing, whatever, I’m proud
I dedicate this poem to you, see it coming through
I gave you my heart, don’t act like you’re surprised

Little love

I stared deep into her eyes
She asked why
I said nothing to worry about
I lied
I need her comfort
Show me a little love
A hug will do
A kiss will be a gift
A hand to offer is a blessing indeed